Martin Joiner’s Blog Confessions of a binge thinker

30Sep/110

Korben Dallas paints beautiful girl playing fetch like a dog

Grrrrr, said the girl as she gently tugged on the rope. Check out the detail on the eyelashes! Booyeah!

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23Sep/110

Do you want to model for a painting? Interesting Faces Required

This is a public call out to anyone of any age or gender who is comfortable pulling silly faces in front of a camera and is up for a laugh. I need interesting, weird and expressive faces/bodies/hands/feet for a series of new big-scale paintings.

The photoshoots are easy and fun and only take about an hour. I usually do them in my flat but can do them anywhere provided there's an electrical socket nearby (to plug my lights in). It's basically just trying out different facial expressions to capture a mood/moment/thought.

I am not offering any wages as such, but of course I do look after my models. I am always happy to buy a pint of beer/cup of coffee and knock them up a tasty lunch to say thank you for their troubles. Oh! And of course, whoever helps me out does get to say that they have been part of a public art project.

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21Sep/110

Cool Personalised (Customised) Lunch Bags Feature Online

How cool is this?!  The interactive personalise your lunch bag feature on the Bag Crazy website.

6Sep/110

Brewmaster Scottish Heavy – 2nd attempt home brew success

I am very chuffed to announce that my second attempt at home-brewing beer is a success. By that I mean I could comfortably drink this until I was drunk! The flavour is almost as good as the professionally brewed stuff that you pay over £3 a bottle for in the supermarkets. But of course this only cost me 30 pence a bottle.

So what did I do differently this time to make it work so much better than the first batch?

  1. Bought a bottle brush to really scrub the inside wall of the bottles with steriliser before bottling
  2. Used only brown bottles to filter sunlight
  3. Brewed in a dark place (my bathroom cupboard)
  4. Was very VERY careful not to stir up sediment during any stage of brewing
  5. Used a method called secondary fermentation (after the initial 4 days of vigorous fermentation I transferred the beer into a fresh container to complete the process, thus separating the beer from the nasty tasting sediment)
  6. Put less sugar in the bottles at bottling

Now I cannot say for sure which of these things accounted for the sudden leap in quality but I think No. 4 was the most important thing. With my first batch I made the rookie error of stirring the beer a couple of days before bottling, mistakenly thinking this would encourage the brewing process. I was wrong, it tainted the beer with a horrible bitter taste and meant most of my first batch went down the drain.

Tasting Session

The beer is nicely carbonated, that is to say it doesn't blow off your sinuses with fizz like some homebrews but it's got enough to compliment the texture which is thin not caramelised. The flavour is earthy but light with a hint of metallic taste similar to stout. Just the right amount of bitterness for my taste, comparable with Newcastle Brown Ale. As for potency it lives up to it's reputation. The term Heavy is an everyday term for the Scots, so my Glaswegian flatmate informs me. One of it's key selling points being that it gets you drunk. During the time it's taken me to write this blog I am already mis-typing words and losing concentration.

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6Sep/110

New painting commission

I've got a commission for an explosion painting. The customer wants a bright yellow base with a rich plum and a dark blue exploded onto it. I am mixing the plum using Alizarin Crimson and French Ultramarine and I am using Prussian Blue for the dark blue. The base will be spectrum yellow. I am producing it on a traditional fabric canvas on wooden stretcher and using oil paints.

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1Sep/110

The Shoe Doctor Taunton

The Shoe Doctor in St. James Street, Taunton <---- New Website by me!

26Aug/110

Korben Dallas speaks on BBC Somerset graffiti phone-in

This is pretty light-hearted stuff. A local radio show asked me to be a phone guest because of my involvement in local street art. I have edited the show down so that this MP3 only contains the 20 minutes that were about graffiti. Only really covers the first couple of pages of the dummy's guide to debating street art but nevertheless all the contributors seem to be well informed liberal thinkers. Makes me proud of my little home town.

BBC Somerset Graffiti Phone-In (Edited)

Correction: I say 2000 on the phone when I meant to say 200. Oops!

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19Aug/110

Launch of Bounce Foam website selling cut to size foam

My latest bit of web work went live last night. Local company Bounce Foam sell foam cut to size. See their website at www.bouncefoam.co.uk

16Aug/110

Ding ding! Round 2. The home brewing continues. (How I am attempting to improve)

The home brewing community seems wrought with people who are trying it once in a flurry of excitement, failing and then giving up. I found some hardly used home brewing equipment, abandoned in the back of a vehicle in the scrap yard last week. I am finding discussion forums on the net where every single member has stopped posting comments and the whole forum lies dormant, the occasion newcomer yelling into the abyss for assistance and receiving no reply. I am not the kind of person to bring a journey to such a young conclusion. If I am doomed to stop brewing one day, let it be after a few damn good attempts!

So I made mistakes on my first homebrew that lead to the batch having an over-powering bitterness in the after taste. I am not sure what I did wrong but I noticed the bitterness seemed to be coming from the sediment. A quick experiment, tasting the dregs of the bottle proved this. I therefore conclude that my mistake must be due to somehow not allowing the sediment to settle as much as I should

My 2 possible causes (aka. Rookie errors):

  1. I kept my fermenter next to my washing machine. My washing machine is old. The vibrations are enough to smash plates and cause waves in the washing-up bowl. I think this vibration might have upset the sediment every few days causing it to never properly settle and therefore create the bitter taste. Solution: I am doing the brew in my bathroom this time, away from any machinery.
  2. I stirred the mix when it wasn't reaching the right gravity. The brewing kit and the hydrometer stated different gravities for bottling. Because I was waiting for the brew to reach a gravity below that which the hydrometer recommended, I started to get frustrated. I stirred the brew, thinking this would encourage the yeast to become more active. In fact all this did was kick up the sediment containing gluten and dead yeast which I reckon tainted the flavour causing the bitterness. In the end the brew was never going to drop to what the hydrometer wanted so I should have followed only the instructions that came with the brewing kit. Solution: I'm not going to stir it.

So my theories are pretty flimsy and I am by no means posting them here as any kind of solution. I am mearly sharing my thought process as I attempt to refine my brewing.

Additional improvements:

  1. My fermenter was positioned so that it got a daily dose of sunlight. I have read this can be bad so my new brew's position in the bathroom is light-free.
  2. I am going to introduce a process called secondary fermentation. It's quite straight forward. You simply transfer the brew into a new clean container after the initial stage of fermentation (about 3 days in the case of my kit). This separates the beer from the 1 inch thick layer of sediment (dead yeast and gluten) that occurs during the aggressive early stage of fermentation. You can now dispose of the crap and let the beer continue to refine inside it's new clean environment.
  3. Two days before bottling I am going to introduce a gelatin based product called finings. This apparently aids the clearing of the brew. It also makes the brew unsuitable for vegetarians which is no major loss. I live in a third floor flat so very few of them would have the energy to reach me anyway.

So wish me luck. I will keep you posted and I look forward to inviting you round for a drink if this batch is a success.

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2Aug/111

Toon render 3D animation for current web client

I just wanted to show you this cool minimalist 3D animation, rendered with a thick toon style edge and shadeless faces. This is the product of a test to see how labour intensive it would be to create several of these sorts of animations. You see, tomorrow I am rebuilding and improving a client's interactive ordering tool for their eCommerce website. The business provides mail-order upholstery foam, cut to size. The various options of shape are displayed in a list and the customer selects by clicking. I needed to know if I will be able to make them rotate on rollover and still keep the job in budget.

Filed under: art, website design 1 Comment